A rare case of “watch the remake instead”.

Death has some dumb ass plans.

Lightning girl Harper finds more bodies and bangs her step-brother some more. It sounds more interesting and scandalous than it reads.

I’M ANGEL MYERS!!! MICHAEL MYERS SISSSSSTTTTTEEERRRRR!!!

Oh look, it’s Izzie. Or Izzy. Or the pregnant chick from “Knocked Up”. Who the fuck cares.

Early 90’s attempt at showing technology that just looks pathetic now.

Murders following the 7 deadly sins.

A very well acted but boring movie.

A man tells his daughter the story of the 3 women he loved when he was younger, allowing her to guess which one is her mother.

A pale white ghost chick with wild black hair always in her face and yucky eyes running around murdering people. Why does that sound familar?